Ritual

I just can't seem to get the hang of Saturdays. That sentence seems wrong, doesn't it? You might not be shocked to read that about Mondays, but Saturdays? Really? That's just WRONG.

So let me explain what I mean. Monday through Friday go pretty much the same for me. I know what to expect. I'm working. Do I like my job? Not really, but as far as jobs go it's okay. There's nothing wrong with it. I wouldn't do it for free but it pays the bills, I get along pretty well with my boss, and I don't mind doing what I do.

Also, on these days I have a routine every morning. My mornings always go pretty much the same. I wake up sometime between 4:00 and 5:00. I let the dog out, put on a pot of coffee, let the dog back in, feed her, and then I sit down to read scripture and pray. This usually takes about an hour and then I write up a blog post reflecting on what I've read. After that I pack my backpack with everything I'll need for the day, get all of my biking clothes together, check the weather, decide what bike to ride, check tire pressure, get everything ready to ride, and then start getting my wife and kids up.

Small things might change in this from day to day, but it's pretty much the same routine. It's my little morning ritual. There's comfort in that. It sounds like I do a lot but it's a mindless doing. Well, not completely mindless but there's not a lot of decisions to be made. And there's comfort in the predictability.

Sundays have their own routine. I read through the Psalms and prepare to lead worship. I leave for the church pretty early, make copies of the music, warm up, and prepare for the arrival of the Praise Band so we can warm up and rehearse together before the worship service. I even get the same flavor donuts each Sunday morning. There's comfort in the ritual. There's comfort in the predictability of it all.

Saturdays have no comfort. We let the kids stay up late on Friday nights. Staying up late pretty much demands that I sleep in a bit. When I wake up, then, I always feel like I'm running behind. I may have time to make coffee, but it feels rushed. I may have time to read scripture, but it feels rushed. There's baseball or basketball or gymnastics to go to. We've got places to be and stuff to do. And it's not always at the same time. Some Saturdays there may be a game at 8:30. Other Saturdays the first thing we have may not be until 11:00. You never know.

I like the comfort in the predictability of my routine. I wonder if our religious rituals are rooted in that comfort. They're repetitive and predictable. To some that's a criticism, a reason not to have rituals. To others that's the beauty of them. They're grounding, centering, and comforting. Sure, there's discipline involved. But it becomes almost mindlessly easy.

As usual I don't know what to make of this. I think it is important to connect with God. I think there are a lot of ways to do this and certain rituals can help. I also don't like the feeling I have when I'm off my routine. I'm lost and confused. Sometimes it happens, though, and we have to be able to find God in the chaos and uncertainty. Maybe I will learn to be able to see God on a Saturday, too.